Out of The Darkness
Self belief changes everything. I remember what it was to not have any self belief, the sense of worthlessness and the debilitation that came with it. It didn't matter what I did, how many awards I won for my work, I never felt good enough. I remember too just how draining life was as I lived in creative block, and how that impacted every area of my life. The two came hand in hand, like a pair of heavy boots I couldn't take off. I distinctly remember standing in the front garden of my then marital home, about 15 or so years ago, feeling like the flame inside me had been snubbed out and all that was left of me was the smouldering wick and the faint orange glow of what was. I've never felt so lost and alone.
The lens I was living my life though was, in short, draining the life out of me. It took a lot of work to get to where I am today, there are times when I just wanted to give everything up - to walk and keep on walking never to return. The only reason I turned back some day's was because of my boys, my center point, my anchor. Finding my way back to me was like the proverbial roller coaster. I was constantly looking for answers and I didn't know who to go to to find them.
I tried everything, including the numbness of anti-depressants and short-lived happiness that comes from the success of an over achiever. Life was great on the outside and so very empty on the inside. I threw myself into my personal and spiritual growth, and as I shed that second skin I had worn for so many years, my creative work began to flourish, and I understood that they were inseparable - the personal and spiritual growth intrinsically fed the creative growth. As my art took me all over the world and I began to understand who I was as an authentic creator ... and my life has never looked the same since.
Fast forward almost a decade, a whole other series of stories, a big life crisis and a shift in perspective - I changed my vocation in life and set out on the mutual journey of helping others believe in themselves and (re) connect to their authentic creative flow.
Meet Beverly, one of the most courageous women I have worked with who has faced her biggest fears and never given up hope. We worked with her saboteurs, rewiring her belief systems - and when she learnt to let go of who she thought she was ... she cleared the way for who she is becoming.
What were you struggling with before doing our work together? Creating anything! I had complete creative block. The Saboteur was so overpowering in me I struggled to find any direction and to get started. If I did start anything it would quickly be abandoned. I couldn't seem to take an idea from concept to completion. Fear would creep in and I would be convinced I had failed before I had even started.
How long have you been struggling with Creative Block and what have you tried in the past that hasn't worked? I have been struggling for three years. I had tried various things from courses which included several photography and art courses, a course in understanding creativity and where it comes from, exploring mindfulness and mental health. Each one helped a little but nothing removed my creative block.
Why did you decide to do this particular work and what was different about working with Clare Louise? I wanted to shift the block I had around creativity. Clare Louise gave me an understanding of how this is affected by The Saboteur within. I could relate to this and the greater awareness I had about it the more I witnessed it in play and how it was stopping my creative flow and filling me with so many limiting beliefs. Through Clare Louise's coaching, tools and strategies I was able to take back control of my life and access my creativity.
I first met Clare Louise on a day course with The RPS. This workshop was incredibly powerful. It left a lasting effect and I knew very clearly that I wanted to do more work with her. She has such a passion for finding the authentic creator within you. I hoped I would leave the course with clarity and direction - what I left with was so much more. The course was incredible value for money - Clare Louise is true to her word and so committed and passionate about helping people find the creative within themselves. Her work is empowering. She is a great listener and has amazing depth and understanding of what it is you are searching for in yourself as a creative. She helps you safely explore all of who you are and how you bring that to your creative purpose, your passion, your business, your life. She instills a self belief in you that you never thought you had which radiates out and impacts all areas of your life. It truly is life changing.
What are the results you are now achieving? This work has had a huge impact on who I am, the creative in me, and what creativity means to me. It has broken down the barriers of fear and resistance within myself. It's created a sense of freedom within me which allows my creative ideas to flow, making it a joy to explore your own creative voice, style and passion.
What's important about this and what have you learnt? What's important is that its gifting me the freedom to create in the moment free of judgement. To play, explore and see what I can create.
How is this work impacting your creative flow? It has given me a long craved for feeling of creative flow. I feel so excited by this. It has bought great freedom , making this a powerful place to create from.
What advice would you give someone who is wondering whether or not to do this work? Do it! It will change your life. You will be able to create from a place of authenticity.
What's changed for you? Everything!